Wednesday, January 27, 2010

Restoring Trust in Relationships Getting Your Ex Back After an Affair

How do you get your ex back even after you’ve cheated?  Some people claim that an affair should always end a relationship.  But I disagree.  I believe that every relationship is savable if both parties really want to work on it.  This article is about restoring trust in relationships.


Restoring trust in relationships requires an adjustment in attitude and actions.  Even after an affair, it is possible to save a relationship.  But that starts with ramping up the level of trust within the couple. 


If you have had an affair, you have had an attitude which allowed you to stray.  There may be something at the relationship’s core that is diseased.  But you can heal the disease.


What was it that you were looking for when you strayed?  Was the sex humdrum?  Was she too busy for you?  Was she just not spending enough time on her grooming?


You wouldn’t have had an affair if the primary relationship was perfect.  So, what needs to be done to fix it?  Often that lies in self analysis.  But just as often, that lies in the couple’s relationship.


Restoring trust in relationships means fixing the underlying problems.  Sometimes that means going into couples counseling.


But just understanding our thoughts isn’t enough.  The next step is to take concrete action in fixing the problems.


The secret to restoring trust in relationships lies not in talking about the right things, but in doing the right things. 


One of the biggest things you can do is to make small promises and keep them.  If you promise to take the trash out every evening, do it.  And, do it consistently.  When you demonstrate that you can be trusted in the small things, a gradual sense of confidence will be realized in the larger picture of the relationship.


Your girlfriend or wife is going to need constant reassurance that you have changed.  This means that you are going to need to apologize more than once over time.  You will also need to treat the recurring comments about the violation of trust as a matter of course.  It is not easy for her to forgive the breach.  If you want to stay with her, you will be patient with her.


This does not mean that you must feel guilty about the indiscretion forever.  In fact, if you allow her to constantly guilt trip you, she will not be satisfied in the new relationship you are building.  Just be understanding.


Finally, you need to put a positive spin on the incident.  Treat it as an opportunity for both of you to grow as individuals and for the relationship to mature.  Just as a bone grows stronger at the place it has been broken, a relationship can improve after an affair.


Restoring trust in a relationship takes time.  It requires that you change both your attitudes and actions.  But it is possible to heal the divide and be a stronger couple as a result.



2 comments:


  1. My name is Katherine and my husband and I have been together for fifteen years married for 5. We have 6 children between the two of us one together. I feel desperate . There is not a day that goes by that we are not arguing and what makes it even worst is that my children and my husband do not talk to each other. I have prayed over this situation but I don't know what else to do as i'm not seeing a change in my husband attitude. He has a very explosive attitude when we try to sit down and talk it always ends up in a feuded argument no matter what I say to him he takes it like i'm putting him down. I can tell that he is struggling with some issues I just dont' know what it is he is not honest with me. don't know what else to do SINCE I REACH DR. ODION LOVE SPELL FOR HELP THROUGH HIS EMAIL: odionspelltemple@gmail.com EVERYTHING HAS FALL IN PLACE THE WAY I EVER WANTED IT TO BE, DO CONTACT HIM TODAY FOR YOUR RELATIONS OR MARRIAGE PROBLEMS

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  2. After being in relationship with Wilson for seven years,he broke up with me, I did everything possible to bring him back but all was in vain, I wanted him back so much because of the love I have for him, I begged him with everything, I made promises but he refused. I explained my problem to someone online and she suggested that I should contact a spell caster that could help me cast a spell to bring him back but I am the type that don't believed in spell, I had no choice than to try it, I meant a spell caster called Dr Zuma zuk and I email him, and he told me there was no problem that everything will be okay before three days, that my ex will return to me before three days, he cast the spell and surprisingly in the second day, it was around 4pm. My ex called me, I was so surprised, I answered the call and all he said was that he was so sorry for everything that happened, that he wanted me to return to him, that he loves me so much. I was so happy and went to him, that was how we started living together happily again. Since then, I have made promise that anybody I know that have a relationship problem, I would be of help to such person by referring him or her to the only real and powerful spell caster who helped me with my own problem and who is different from all the fake ones out there. Anybody could need the help of the spell caster, his email: spiritualherbalisthealing@gmail.com or call him +2349055637784 you can email him if you need his assistance in your relationship or anything. CONTACT HIM NOW FOR SOLUTION TO ALL YOUR PROBLEMS

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